Terrible Neon

Characters

Men:

Aaron Bard: A poet and playwright.

Joseph Bard: His father.

Pierrot: A clown (doubles for ‘Drunk’ in I, i).

Rhodes: Aaron’s ex-boyfriend; a theater director.

Seth: --

Women:

Rose Bard: Aaron’s mother.

Renee Kasler: The interviewer (doubles for Bartender [silent] in I, i).

Lee: --

Susan, Ashley, and Laura: Three actresses.

Emily: A friend of Aaron’s.

Anna Crause: A literature professor.

Phyllis: Rose’s roommate.

Etcetera:

Pageant Players: Dancers, singers, musicians, etc.

moonish paper
    rocking white
green, those shadows
    greened with age
prophets call in blinking lights
    like neon buzzing on my page ¹

¹ The performance begins with two whole or partial readings of this fragment. The first is delivered to a dark house by whomever the director wishes to read (Aaron, Seth, the three actresses, etc.); the second, by Aaron after the stage lights come up.

Act I

i. autumn leaves

Aaron

(reads)

moonish paper
    rocking white
green, those shadows
    greened with age
prophets call in blinking lights
    like neon buzzing on my page

Seth

that was lovely
what’s it mean

Aaron

like i told you
    i don’t know

Seth

poems learn from how we dream
read the meaning
    then you’ll know

Aaron

read the meaning, not the words

Seth

read the eye beyond the ink
it’s the hardest thing to learn

Aaron

congrats
    you earned yourself a drink

scotch

Seth

you’re welcome--on the rocks

Aaron

one for me and for... my friend...

Seth

seth

Aaron

i didn’t--

Seth

you forgot

Aaron

so i did--my memory’s spent

Drunk ²

² The actor playing the Drunk doubles for Pierrot, as does the actress playing the bartender double for Renee Kasler.

superdead...
    i knew you’d come

Aaron

me

Drunk

    not you, the other guy
are you famous--

Aaron

are you drunk

Drunk

you were in my dream last night

Seth

strange, i don’t remember that

Drunk

you’re a liar
    i was there

Seth

if you insist
i’ll take it back

Drunk

take it forward--i don’t care

Aaron

he’s been like this for ages now
    just ignore him--there’s no use

Seth

another case of lost unfound

Aaron

sure, i guess...

Seth

what’s your excuse

Aaron

mine...

Seth

it’s only six o’clock

Drunk

monday evening, cloudy skies

Seth

and here you’re on your second scotch
an empty stool on either side

Aaron

i save these for officious guests

Drunk

october seventh, 9:15

Seth

so, put simply, i’m a pest

Aaron

for the moment, so it seems

Seth

that’s unfriendly
i can go

Aaron

(anxious)

sit here--please--and i’ll be kind

Drunk

autumn leaves, they sadly blow...
yesterday i almost cried

Aaron

you’re the first to try it out...
    this one’s for the men i like
is it comfy

Seth

just about

Aaron

it’s been ages--give it time

Drunk

fillerup, i’m runnin’ low
    don’t you tell me... i’ll be fine
another shot
    i’m good to go

Aaron

i think you’ve had enough tonight

Drunk

don’t you tell me... not at all
    don’t you wonder where i’ve been

i dreamt a spring without a fall
    a garden where the air made skin

Aaron

no... i’m sorry--

Drunk

don’t you care

Aaron

no... i’m sorry...
    it’s okay--

Drunk

that liar’s sitting in my chair
    don’t you tell me...
you’re ashamed...

Aaron

is he sleeping

Seth

yes, he’s down

do you--

Aaron

do i--

Seth

feel ashamed

Aaron

sometimes, sure--

Seth

and do you now

Aaron

i feel tipsy--who can say

Seth

tipsy’s far from drunk enough
two more shots of scotch on ice

Aaron

thankyou...

Seth

seth

Aaron

    you called my bluff...
i swear next time i’ll get it right

Seth

a toast to memory

Aaron

bottoms up

Drunk

(sleepily)

bottoms down for all i care

Aaron

and to meaning’s ancient stuff

Seth

and to aaron’s kindness chair

Aaron

aaron’s--

Seth

yes

Aaron

you know my name

Seth

that’s the second time you’ve asked

Aaron

is it--

Seth

you should see your face
only you’d forget so fast

Aaron

i’m a ninny, i confess
    tipsy’s drunk enough for me

Seth

they say that poets don’t forget

Aaron

nonsense...
    it’s our specialty

Seth

then i’ll remind you--your excuse

Aaron

my empty stool on either side

Seth

you remember

Aaron

    yes, i do
i come here for some quiet time

Seth

(about Drunk)

doesn’t he disturb the hush

Aaron

sometimes yes but mostly no

Seth

mostly--

Aaron

am i drunk enough...

better him than be alone

Drunk

(sleepily)

jesus blinked me black and green

Seth

terrible--that seventh eye
heaven cupped its hands to me
an on-and-off
    a firefly

Aaron

yours

Seth

i’m quoting

Aaron

ah, i see

Seth

a certain someone

Aaron

yes... from whom

Seth

i’d like to take him home with me

Aaron

lucky poet

Seth

it’s from you

Aaron

sorry

Seth

why

Aaron

        it’s not my best
you know my poems

Seth

every line

Aaron

all my crippled, stale attempts...

Seth

at what

Aaron

at nothing--nevermind

Seth

you must really hate yourself

Aaron

now i need another shot

Seth

no, you’re lonely
i can help

Aaron

that’s just what the last one thought

Seth

this is different

Aaron

so was he

Seth

and you left him

Aaron

how’d you know

Drunk

(sleepily)

all those lonely months and weeks

Aaron

i should really...
    i should go

Seth

no, you shouldn’t--

Aaron

where’s my pen

Seth

you don’t want to

Aaron

yes... you’re right

Seth

it’s been ages, as you said
just this evening
    just one night

Aaron

you’d be sorry--wait a bit

Drunk

(wakes)

i dreamt a shaky autumn moon

Aaron

by twelve o’clock you’d have your pick

Seth

aaron bard
i’m asking you

Aaron

where’s my notepad

Seth

in your coat
are you coming

Aaron

one more sip...

Seth

you look as if you’d seen a ghost

Aaron

that verse--i never published it

Seth

jesus blinked me...

Aaron

that’s the one

Seth

i’ll admit i snuck a peek

Aaron

when

Seth

before, while you were gone

Aaron

i think i’ve had too much to drink

Seth

that’s alright
we’ll take it slow

Aaron

slowly... seth--

Seth

you’re almost there

Drunk

autumn leaves, they sadly blow
    sadly blowing who knows where

ii. first pageant: creation ³

So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, “Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth”....And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, it was very good.

– Genesis

³ The pageants are spectacles interspersed throughout Terrible Neon. They draw parallels between Aaron’s quest and the biblical continuum of the creation and fall of Adam and Eve, the birth, crucifixion, and resurrection of Christ, and the apocalypse. The passages cited beneath the pageant-titles hope to inspire dance, song, or whatever other mediums the director may choose to invest in the pageants. Pageant-actors may even recite these passages, though not without a heightened awareness of the body.
In order to situate the pageants, their titles should be announced, printed on oversized cards, etcetera.

iii. knocky knocky ⁴

⁴ Pierrot’s opening line follows the first nightmarish appearance of Joseph Bard. Joseph Bard is dressed in formal military uniform and carries a pistol which he aims at Aaron. He is already gone by the time Pierrot arrives.

Pierrot

knocky knocky

Aaron

who are you

Pierrot

peekabooboo

Aaron

you’re the sot

Pierrot

i don’t drink--it makes me puke
wanna bet

Aaron

i’d rather not

did you see him

Pierrot

i don’t know

Aaron

him... my father--

Pierrot

please describe

Aaron

a pistol--

Pierrot

biggish

Aaron

i suppose

Pierrot

i think he’s snoozing by your side

Aaron

you’re a riot

Pierrot

you’re a poop

Aaron

are you sure you didn’t see--

Pierrot

i could call him back for you

Aaron

no

Pierrot

you’re certain

Aaron

stay with me

Pierrot

was he scary

Aaron

yes, he was

Pierrot

did he try to gun you down

Aaron

shoot me, no...
    he never does

Pierrot

then what’s there to be scared about

Aaron

he’s my father...
    i don’t know

Pierrot

you can’t say that
it’s no good

Aaron

(falling asleep)

shoot me, yes...

Pierrot

it’s time to go

Aaron

...sometimes, yes... i wish he would

Pierrot

aaron, stop ignoring me

you can’t say that
    it’s not true

i’m compelled to this extreme
    stick ’em up or else i’ll shoot

Aaron

where’d you get that

Pierrot

from your pa
up and adam, there you go

yikes--you’re naked ⁵
    catch it

⁵ It is absolutely essential that the actor playing Aaron appears nude here and later in scene six.

Aaron

(catches gun)

ha

Pierrot

oops, i blundered

Aaron

yes, i know

Pierrot

you can’t do this
it’s not right

Aaron

now i’ve got you

Pierrot

watch your aim

Aaron

who are you and where am i

Pierrot

small, your pistol--
such a shame

(grabs back gun)

fine, i’ll tell you
    just don’t shoot

Aaron

but you’ve got the gun on me

Pierrot

liar...--
    yes, of course i do
it’s a water pistol--see

Aaron

(grabs Pierrot)

stop your clowning

Pierrot

it’s my job
not my ruffle--i just pressed...

Aaron

(lets him go)

no... it’s early...
    i’ll wake up

Pierrot

no, we’re lagging
here, get dressed

i can’t find your dungarees

Aaron

over there, beside the bed

Pierrot

my poor ruffle
look, it’s creased

Aaron

am i dreaming
    am i dead

Pierrot

there, you’re decent
shall we go

you can’t wake him
    he’ll be fine

come, don’t dawdle
    leave your coat

that’s more like it...

Seth

yes--goodnight

iv. the interview begins

Aaron’s Voice

(Renee plays tape)

i pray to mary, mother eve
    the sky snaps shut
        a round prediction
i pray to time and father god
    the sun is red like science fiction

(fastforward)

i come black from eden
i come blind from thebes
i crawl back from heaven
    on worship-weary knees

(fastforward)

perhaps, forgotten, i was found--
    overheard like something new:
a secret bible read aloud...

Renee

enter
    aaron, i presume

tardy--i expected that
    poets never come on time
have a seat and settle back
    pull the lever

it reclines

(on telephone)

lee, i’ll need you--are you--no--
    aaron bard has just arrived--

(to Aaron)

there’s no smoking, so you know

(on telephone)

wait--on second--give us five

(to Aaron)

coffee

Aaron

thankyou

Renee

        just don’t spill
use a coaster

Aaron

i’ll be fine

Renee

cream or sugar
    flavored milk

Aaron

almond

Renee

i don’t have that kind

so you’re aaron
    i’m renee
pleased to meet you (watch your cup)
i just scanned your latest tape
    some of it was brilliant stuff

all the rest was too obscure
    meaning’s not your grand intent
how you poets love your words
    just the same, you did your best

are you hungry

Aaron

who are you

Renee

i just told you
    i’m renee
sugar cookies, nuts, or fruit

Aaron

i already know your name

Renee

(on telephone)

lee--we’re ready--it’s okay--
no--it’s nothing--he’ll be fine

(to Aaron)

have a cookie, they’re gourmet
feeling better
    give it time

Pierrot

knocky knocky

Renee

who is this

Pierrot

peeka... golly, who is she

Renee

i’m renee

Pierrot

(of Lee)

and i’m bewitched

Renee

this is my assistant, lee

Pierrot

(to Lee)

i’m your servant
    i’m your slave
take these roses or i’ll die

Renee

you’re unwelcome, i’m afraid
    take a seat and wait outside

Pierrot

lee, my darling--

Renee

that’s enough

Pierrot

you can’t make me
i won’t go

Renee

who are you to tell me what--

Pierrot

greetings from monsieur pierrot

Renee

pleased to meet you
there’s the door

Pierrot

you can’t make me--

Renee

go away

Pierrot

lee, i’ll love you evermore

Aaron

i’d prefer it if he stayed

Renee

would you really--

Pierrot

yessiree
aaron, you’re my bestest friend

Renee

it’s unheard of
    it’s obscene
would you really--

Pierrot

like he said

Renee

i can’t have it

Pierrot

i’ll behave

Renee

do you promise

Pierrot

cross my heart

Renee

(to Aaron)

the choice is really yours to make
    do you want him here or not

Aaron

...yes

Renee

alrighty

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

you’re a doll

Renee

(to Pierrot)

if you’re finished, we’ll commence--

Pierrot

you’re my hero

Renee

if that’s all--

Pierrot

(to Lee)

sweetheart--

Renee

quiet

Pierrot

(to Lee)

later hence

Renee

(to Aaron)

are you ready

Aaron

i don’t know

Renee

just be honest
    it’s alright
answer simply
    short and slow
lee will listen and transcribe

do you know who brought you here

Pierrot

october seventh, 9:15--

Renee

you are not to interfere

Pierrot

pardon me, your majesty

Renee

do you, aaron

Aaron

i was drunk

Pierrot

too much liquor down the hatch

Renee

you’re unruly

Pierrot

you’re a grump

Renee

have a cookie
    stuff your trap

(to Aaron)

please, keep going

Aaron

(of Pierrot)

then he came
i was sleeping--

Renee

all alone

Aaron

yes... i mean...
    i lost his name

Renee

(to Lee)

that’s important
    make a note

(to Aaron)

where’d you meet him

Aaron

at a bar

Renee

please, keep going

Aaron

    he was nice
strange and handsome

Pierrot

tall and dark

Aaron

we were drinking scotch on ice

Renee

then...

Pierrot

he asked to take you home

Aaron

i’d prefer it not to speak--

Renee

(to Pierrot)

let him answer on his own

Pierrot

he won’t answer--

Renee

have a peach
sorry aaron
    please resume

Aaron

i don’t see how this relates--

Pierrot

that’s evasion

Renee

(to Pierrot)

eat your fruit
aaron, please--it’s getting late

Aaron

nothing happened--

Pierrot

they were nude

(singsong)

aaron’s lying

Renee

(to Pierrot)

shut your mouth

Aaron

nothing happened--
    it’s the truth

(to Lee)

for the record, take it down...
she’s not typing

Renee

no, she’s not

Aaron

(to Lee)

i just told you--

Renee

leave her be
i’ll assume that you forgot:
    choose your answers honestly

Aaron

yes, we... did it

Pierrot

atta boy
top or bottom--tell the truth

Aaron

you’re disgusting

Pierrot

i’m a joy

Aaron

i’m embarrassed

Pierrot

you’re a prude

Renee

(to Pierrot)

are you finished

Pierrot

yes, i am

Renee

(to Aaron)

why embarrassed

Aaron

nevermind

Pierrot

you can’t say that
it’s a sham

Aaron

let me answer

Renee

take your time

Aaron

someone’s always... looking on

Renee

someone--

Aaron

something... even now...
even here it isn’t gone

Renee

(to Lee)

this is crucial
take it down

Aaron

first i found it in the sky
    raging like a second sun
i saw it next in mother’s eyes
i see it now in father’s gun

always changing
    always there
i can’t help it...

Renee

it’s okay

Aaron

is it really

Renee

i don’t know

Pierrot

have a cookie

Aaron

go away

v. second pageant: judgement approaches

Yes, sign of judgement yes
Sign of judgement yes
Sign of judgement time ain’t long

– Kid Prince Moore

vi. the bards

Renee

i’ve read your poems and your plays
    seven volumes
        quite a feat
and you’re only--

Pierrot

twenty eight

Renee

(to Pierrot)

have another bite to eat

(to Aaron)

anyway, i’ve read them all

Aaron

you’re a precious rarity

Renee

they say the poem bears the soul

Aaron

or the wish for one at least

Renee

that’s not funny

Aaron

true enough

Pierrot

gee, i thought it made the mark

Renee

(to Pierrot)

must you always interrupt

Pierrot

i’m just here to do my part

Renee

(reads to Aaron)

grudgingly, i learned to pray
    mother taught me all the lines
hebrew torture--just the same
    this is how i learned to write

father’s lessons left me maimed
    still i followed his advice
readily, i grew ashamed
    this is how i live my life

(to Aaron)

this is from your second play

Aaron

it’s been ages

Pierrot

seven years

Renee

(to Lee)

cited from the thirteenth page
    use quotations--that’s a dear

(to Aaron)

so, your parents
    is this them

Aaron

not exactly

Pierrot

please describe

Aaron

that’s the way i saw them then
    then and now are different times

Pierrot

are they really
please explain--

Renee

anyway, your mom and dad
    rose and joseph are their names

(to Lee)

be sure to make a note of that

(to Aaron)

your father is an analyst

Pierrot

remember what you used to say

(to Renee)

he boasted to the other kids
    my daddy fixes broken brains

Aaron

it’s been ages...

Renee

and your mom...
she’s a writer--

Aaron

no...--she wrote

Renee

retired
    she’s the lucky one

Aaron

ever since she had her stroke

Renee

o... i’m sorry

Aaron

please, what for

Renee

how’d it happen

Aaron

    she was old
and a kosher carnivore

it just happened...
    i don’t know

Pierrot

remember how she used to sing

Aaron

she wrote a book of children’s songs
    limericks mostly...

Renee

(to Pierrot)

let him think

Aaron

it’s been ages...
    where’s it gone...

Pierrot

(sings to Aaron)

there once was a pepper named zing
    a whimsical pinch of a thing
but nothing so vast as a giant could blast
    the whimsy of peppers like him

Rose

(sings to Aaron)

and then there’s the kettle named t
    (the moral--you’ll heed it my sweet)
rather than share, she poured herself bare
    and mourned her lost belly of tea

remember the lesson of grape
    the jam whom all clamored to taste
over the rest, he bragged himself best
    few friends had the jelly named grape

(Aaron hums)

and then there’s the lettuce called leaf
    (my pepper, you’re almost asleep)
he envied the dressing, a flavorful blessing
    no wonder that lettuce is green

(says to herself)

there once was a mirror named i
    a poet, a mother, a wife

(to Aaron)

sweetness, goodnight
    dream sound and sleep tight
no monsters to haunt you tonight

Renee

rosey cohen
    here’s the text

Pierrot

she always used her maiden name

Renee

even after they were wed

Aaron

she’d published first
    they married late

Pierrot

remember how you used to brag

Aaron

the critics gave her good reviews

Pierrot

you crowed them out in english class

(reads)

my mommy’s “brilliant yet subdued”

Aaron

i was seven

Pierrot

you were eight

Aaron

father boasted just as loud
    he put the jackets on display
        and showed his patients...
he was proud

Pierrot

aaron made him prouder still

Aaron

no, i didn’t--

Pierrot

that’s a lie
you remember
    he was thrilled
he told you that a thousand times

Aaron

every father tells his son--

Pierrot

that’s evasion
second count

Aaron

you don’t know me

Renee

that’s enough

(to Pierrot)

swallow first or spit it out

Pierrot

remember when you broke your nose
you were seven

Aaron

...i was nine

Pierrot

blood--it hurried down your robe
remember, you forgot to tie--

Aaron

(to Renee)

change the subject--

Pierrot

you were scared
scared your parents might suspect--

Aaron

(to Renee)

change the subject--

Pierrot

(to Renee)

don’t you dare

(to Aaron)

you remember--say it

Aaron

...yes

Pierrot

(to Renee)

aaron’s cousin spent the night

(to Aaron)

cousin what’s it

Aaron

cousin shawn

Pierrot

(to Renee)

kinky critters--

Aaron

that’s a lie

Pierrot

(to Renee)

playing doctor till the dawn

Aaron

(to Pierrot)

you can’t do this
    it’s not right

Pierrot

(to Renee)

they were naked--
    then the blood
aaron hurried--where to hide
his father found him in the tub

Joseph

just stop crying
    tilt your head

Aaron

(to Joseph)

daddy let me tie my robe

Joseph

just stop crying
    i just said--

Aaron

let me fix it

Joseph

let it go

Rose

joseph, aaron--
    o my god
how’d this happen

Joseph

i don’t know

Rose

is it broken

Joseph

aaron, stop--

(to Rose)

call a doctor

Rose

where’s the phone

Aaron

let me fix it

Joseph

take it off

Aaron

please don’t make me

Rose

you’ll upset--

Joseph

(strips Aaron)

jesus, aaron--knock it off

Rose

(on telephone)

yes--hello--

Joseph

(to Aaron)

now tilt your head

Rose

(to Aaron)

aaron--

(on telephone)

yes--we think he broke--

Joseph

just stop squirming

Aaron

give it back

Rose

(to Joseph)

let him wear the fucking robe

(on telephone)

-- number seven--lincoln ave--

(to Joseph)

the ambulance is on its way

(to Aaron)

where’s your cousin

Aaron

he’s in bed

Rose

(to Joseph)

go and check if he’s okay

(to Aaron)

if not, your aunt will have my head

(covers Aaron)

quiet sweetness
    you’ll be fine

Aaron

daddy’s angry

Rose

he was scared

Aaron

mom--my bathrobe--

Rose

    it’s alright
tilt your head

(of nose)

and pinch it there

Renee

lee, some napkins...

(to Aaron)

for the blood

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

how’d it happen

Renee

(to Pierrot)

let him rest

Aaron

...shawn and i... were making love...
you remember--

Joseph

let it go

Aaron

father saw... we weren’t dressed...

Pierrot

so he hit you

Aaron

...father caught--

Pierrot

so he gave your face a wham

Aaron

yes

Pierrot

you’re lying

Aaron

no i’m not

Renee

(to Pierrot)

this has gotten out of hand

Aaron

you can’t do this
    it’s no fair

Pierrot

it’s not me you’re lying to
please, remember--

Aaron

    i don’t care
it’s been ages--

Pierrot

yes, you do

Renee

(to Pierrot)

this is finished--
    that is all

i should give your face a whack
see that corner--face the wall
    think it over, then come back

(to Aaron)

take a moment

Aaron

i’m okay

Renee

if you’re certain, we’ll resume

Pierrot

(to Renee)

i’ve been thinking--

Renee

(to Pierrot)

go away

Pierrot

but i’m sorry--

Aaron

good for you

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

knocky knocky
    let me in

Renee

(to Pierrot)

quiet--

Pierrot

aaron
peekaboo
don’t you giggle
    don’t you grin

Aaron

(gives way)

you’re not funny

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

that’s not true

Renee

(on telephone)

kasler speaking--who is this--
    o--one moment--

(to Aaron)

it’s your dad

(on telephone)

sure--you’re welcome--here he is--
    there’s no trouble--good to chat--

Aaron

(on telephone)

hi--i’m certain--how are you--
    are you calling on the cell--
yes, you’re breaking--i just knew--
    that’s much better--i can tell--

is she--then you’re at the home--
    how’s she doing--just alright--
yes--i visit--i don’t know--
    i’ve been busy--dad, i tried--

is that such a good idea--
    yes--but she can barely talk--

mom--it’s aaron--good to hear--
mom--the line is breaking up--

things are going well of late--
    how’s your roommate getting on--
i’ve been working like a slave--
    sorry that it’s been so long--

mom--you’re breaking up again--
    i’m not going--it’s the line--
mom--i’ll see you soon, and then--
    don’t start crying--it’s alright--

(to Renee)

disconnected

Renee

    that’s a shame
lee could always call them back--

Aaron

dad would answer--
    there’s no way

Renee

there’s no pressure
    just relax

Aaron

jesus christ, he should have known
    mother always gets upset
and his stupid telephone
    it never fails to disconnect

Pierrot

remember when you saw her last
friday evening, heavy winds

Aaron

i don’t want to think of that

Pierrot

look, she’s waiting--

Phyllis

come on in
howdy stranger

Aaron

phyllis, hi

Phyllis

aaron’s come to see you rose

Aaron

how’s she doing

Phyllis

good tonight

(to Rose)

you’re a trooper
    ain’t that so

Aaron

(to Phyllis)

you seem better
    how’s the hip

Phyllis

bad as ever--it’s a pain
    but they’ve upped the dosages
nice and dopey
    no complaints

Aaron

(of Rose)

look, she’s laughing

Phyllis

sure, why not

Aaron

i can never make her laugh

Phyllis

you’re not funny

Aaron

i forgot

Phyllis

but i, my darlin’, am a gas

Aaron

any other guests tonight

Phyllis

just your daddy

Aaron

how is he

Phyllis

he, i think, is doing fine

(to Rose)

what a sexy hunk a’ beef

Aaron

mom, i’ll light the candles now

Phyllis

you’re a little late for that
hours since the sun’s been down

Aaron

mom, i’m sorry

(to Phyllis)

got a match

Phyllis

just a second
let me see

Aaron

(to Rose)

look, i brought your favorite dye

Phyllis

(searches, to Rose)

hear that rosey--what a treat

Aaron

(to Rose)

auburn, number twenty five

Phyllis

(searches)

panties, panties--

(to Aaron)

here you go

Aaron

thanks a million

Phyllis

anytime

(to Rose)

see the candles
    see ’em rose
aaron’s gonna dim the lights

ain’t that lovely
    say a prayer
you can say it in your mind
god’ll hear you
    rose, i swear--
god’ll answer in his time

(to Aaron)

you remind me of your dad

Aaron

just because i never pray

Phyllis

no, not only
    though there’s that--
friday nights he never stays

Aaron

he’s not jewish

Phyllis

what--am i

Aaron

he distrusts authority

Phyllis

(to Rose)

men are stupid
    ain’t that right

(to Aaron)

you’re no smarter, tweedle-dee

(takes Aaron aside)

aaron, rosey’s been upset
    all this anger toward your dad
not my business--

Aaron

that’s correct--

Phyllis

but ain’t you such a spoiled brat
what’s your daddy ever done

Aaron

all my life or just this year

Phyllis

ain’t you smarmy
you’re his son

Aaron

(of Rose)

he’s the one who put her here

Phyllis

don’t you blame the man for that
he’s your daddy

Aaron

i’m aware--

Phyllis

the only one you’ll ever have
don’t you know how much he cares
think it over

(to Rose)

    as for you
aaron’s gonna fix your hair

(to Aaron)

snuff the candles when you’re through

(to Rose)

maybe first he’ll say a prayer

Aaron

(to Rose)

let’s get started--
    you look great
i’ll just wheel you to the sink

(reads)

fifteen minutes
    goodbye gray

(to Rose)

not as taxing as you’d think

you look lovely
    tilt your head
are you comfy
    it’s alright
now we’re on the second step
just a moment

(reads)

mix the dye

(to Rose)

think we’re finished
    i agree
oooh, the water’s freezing cold
mom, i’m sorry--
    stupid me
take the towel--there--and hold--

phyllis says you’re doing well
    getting better
        i can see
you can swallow by yourself

now the color

(reads)

shake and squeeze

(to Rose)

have you eaten
    how’d it taste
really awful
    all those greens
bet you’re pining for a steak

(reads)

douse and lather, then repeat

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

remember when you dyed your hair

Aaron

(to Rose)

mom, remember
    black as ink
inkier than dad could bear
    boy, i got a punishing

i outgrew the rebel ’tude
    bought some bleach to strip the dye
but it only stripped the roots
you and dad were mortified

it left a yellow centerpart
    i tried to pass it off for punk
but my sham was blown apart
    my classmates called me “aaron skunk”

you shleped me to your colorist
    mom, remember

Pierrot

brenda schwartz

Aaron

(to Rose)

it took all day to have it fixed
    gees, i’ve never been so bored--

mom, remember...
    that’s too bad

(reads)

let the color saturate

(to Rose)

nevermind
    i understand

fifteen minutes
    now we wait

i’ve been doing well this week
    same as always
        nothing new
i had lunch with aunt janine
    she’ll come by to see you soon

o, you noticed...
    gave it back
rhodes and i... we broke it off
    i’m surprised you noticed that

(jokes)

better now than get divorced

things just weren’t working out
    don’t get weepy
        it’s okay...
nothing’s there to cry about...
    it’s just empty... rubbed away

it’s ironic, after all--
    this, your crying; once again
remember when he came to call

    you were bawling with regret
mom, remember...
    yes, you do
now we’re finished, and you grieve
    it’s poetic

(imitates Phyllis)

        ain’t that true
life’s a bag of ironies

mom, i’m sorry
    i’m upset...
look, it’s nearly ten to nine
five more minutes
    how’s your head
mom, i’m sorry
    it’s alright

dad, he never shed a tear
    not in front of me at least
he just laughed and said, “you’re queer”
    he said it scientifically
now he’s hoping i’ll convert
    i refuse to lead him on
still he claims i’ll find the urge
    if we mend our fractured bond

mom, i had that dream again
    had it every day this week
mom, remember...
    i was ten
maybe younger...
    nine, i think

father in his formal blues
    he wore them in the vet’s parade
every year i’d shine his shoes
    and watch them sparkle down the lane
you and i would fight the sun
    to spy his marching silhouette
in my dream he holds a gun...

(of Rose’s hair)

now we’ve reached the final step

(reads)

rinse, condition, rinse, and dry

(to Rose)

are you ready
    here we go

(tests water)

there, it’s perfect
    close your eyes

(of hair)

it’s really looking wonderful

mom, i think i’ll say a prayer
    nothing epic
        just a wish
just a little plea to where
    you used to say “the big one sits”

mom, i hope they’ll serve you steak
mom, i wish i made you laugh
mom, i hope your hair looks great
mom, i wish your memory back

Pierrot

(sings)

there once was a pepper named zing
    a whimsical pinch of a thing
but nothing so vast as a giant could blast
    the whimsy of peppers like him ⁶

⁶ Rose remembers.

vii. third pageant: the fall and birth of christ

And when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make one wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat....and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God amongst the trees of the garden. And the Lord called unto Adam, and said unto him, “Where art thou?” And he said, “I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.”

– Genesis

The angel Michael...comes...to explain, who that Seed of Woman shall be, which was promised Adam and Eve in the Fall; his incarnation, death, resurrection, and ascension...

– Milton

“Joseph, thou son of David, fear not to take unto thee Mary thy wife: for that which is conceived in her is of the Holy Ghost. And she shall bring forth a son, and thou shalt call his name JESUS: for he shall save his people from their sins...”

– Matthew

viii. a garden full of thieves

Renee

(to Aaron)

you directed all your plays

Aaron

i assisted...
it was rough

Pierrot

(to Renee)

rhodes directed
    they’re engaged

Renee

(to Aaron)

congratulations

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

mazel tov

Renee

(to Lee)

that’s important
    take it down

(to Aaron)

she’s not typing

Aaron

    no, she’s not
check your data

Renee

here, i found...
i’m so sorry--i forgot
what about your latest play
    who’ll direct it

Aaron

i don’t know

Renee

you--

Aaron

forget it--
there’s no way...
really, it’s too difficult

Susan

before the seconds learned to tick

Ashley

before the hours learned to chime

Susan and Ashley

before we lived as scientists
    counting oceans, moons, and time

Laura

i kept a garden made of spring
    trees and tulips, bears and bugs

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

before the age of numbering
i count creation all at once

Laura

i wear my flesh with brazen awe
    i name my body, unafraid

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

our bodies hold the sacred laws
and so we name them, unashamed

Laura

angels murmur through my blood
    they chant in voices thin and old

Susan

i’m the scripture

Ashley

i, the yad

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

the angels murmured and foretold

beware

Susan

your garden’s full of thieves

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware

Ashley

the neon in the sky

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware

Laura

your tulips and your trees

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware of monsters in disguise

Laura

the angels cast their prophesy
    and i listen

Susan and Ashley

shhh, beware

Laura

but now i’m frightened

Susan and Ashley

shamefully

Laura

knowledge ate me unawares

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

our bodies hold the sacred truths

Susan

i’m the carcass

Ashley

i, the blade

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

i stab my image in a pool

Laura

i looked and saw a monster’s face

Ashley

knowledge ate me--

Laura

(to Ashley)

that’s my line

Ashley

shit

Susan

i thought that i came next

Laura

(to herself)

i stab my image--

(to Susan)

no, it’s mine

Ashley

fuck

Aaron

(to Ashley)

no need to get upset
that was really...--

Rhodes

that was great
susan, laura--very nice
now you’ve really got the pace

ashley

Ashley

what

Rhodes

it’s just the lines

Ashley

yeah, too many

Aaron

i could cut--

Ashley

look, i’m in a sour mood

Renee

(to Aaron)

she seems touchy

Rhodes

time is up

Ashley

(to Rhodes)

no, we’re late

Aaron

(to Renee)

it’s nothing new

Ashley

it’s this prom dress

Aaron

it’s a gown

Ashley

rhodes, it makes my ass look huge
    plus my tits keep popping out

Laura

(to Ashley)

i could take it in for you

Aaron

thankyou laura

Rhodes

(to Ashley)

problem solved

Laura

(inspects dress)

there’s no trouble
    just a stitch

Ashley

(to Aaron)

i doubt a stitch will do the job

Pierrot

knocky knocky
what a bitch

Susan

ashley, laura--need a ride

Ashley

sue, i’m coming

Rhodes

(to Laura)

thanks again

Susan

laura, coming

Laura

(to Rhodes)

anytime

(to Aaron)

catchya’ later

Aaron

see you then

(of Ashley)

rhodes, she’s evil

Rhodes

it’s the dress

Aaron

she’s our monster in disguise

Rhodes

aaron, really--

Aaron

    she’s a hex
you said as much the other night

Rhodes

(massages Aaron)

she can’t help it
    it’s the meds

Aaron

that’s a pretty stale excuse
    a dozen shrinks have shrunk her head

Rhodes

ashley warned us of her moods

Aaron

rhodes, i hate her

Rhodes

shhh, you’re tense

Aaron

so do they and so do you

Rhodes

they

Aaron

the other actresses

Rhodes

no they don’t

Aaron

but rhodes, i do

Rhodes

she used to be your closest friend

Aaron

ours, darling--
    ouch

Rhodes

a knot

Aaron

ashley... she was different then
ouch

Rhodes

keep breathing

Aaron

you can stop

Renee

(to Aaron)

you and rhodes began to date--

Pierrot

almost forty months ago

Aaron

this would have been our seventh play

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

think it’s time we started home

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

sure--we ready

Rhodes

in a sec

Aaron

i’ll just throw your trash away

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

oopth, i’m sowwy

Aaron

you’re a mess

Rhodes

but you love me anyway
so, i’m waiting--whadcha think

Aaron

of your actors or my scene
ehhh
it’s got its share of kinks

Rhodes

what--the actors

Aaron

both, it seems

Renee

(to Aaron)

i enjoyed it

(of Pierrot)

so did he

Aaron

(to Renee)

i never like the way it sounds

(to Rhodes)

it’s not you or them
    it’s me

Rhodes

we’ll do better for a crowd

Aaron

ready yet

Rhodes

i’m almost done

Aaron

(playful)

god, god, you’re awful

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

yesth, i know

Aaron

(playful)

fine, i’m leaving
    bye

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

    uhuh
i will punch you in the nose

Aaron

ooo, i’m shaking

Rhodes

be prepared

Aaron

rhodes, that tickles

Rhodes

yes it does
aaron, aaron--not the hair
aaron--i don’t have enough

girlie fighter

Aaron

shut your mouth
what’s the matter

Rhodes

...i forgot:
ashley’s coming to the house

Aaron

when

Rhodes

...tomorrow, eight o’clock

Aaron

you asked her over

Rhodes

we’ll go out--

Aaron

o, and what--i’ll stay at home
gees, the shit she pulled just now
you don’t even like her rhodes

Rhodes

no, not always

    not tonight
we made these plans a while back

Aaron

call and cancel

Rhodes

that’s not right

Aaron

neither is her endless crap
and you never get involved

Rhodes

what

Aaron

    when ashley throws a fit
rhodes, it’s always “problem solved”
    i’m the one who deals with it

like the dresses

Rhodes

here we go

Aaron

it’s too late to bring them back
ashley--watch--she’ll bitch and moan
    and i’ll be fronted with the tab

Rhodes

laura said she’d take it in

Aaron

(imitates Ashley)

i doubt a stitch will do the job

Rhodes

can’t we wait to cross that bridge

Aaron

sure, tomorrow--just you watch

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

sowwy awon

Aaron

don’t be cute

Rhodes

so we’ll slate another chat

Aaron

you know better
    that won’t do
why’d we even ask her back

Rhodes

well, she’s loyal--seven shows
and she really loves your plays

Aaron

we should drop her even so

Rhodes

aaron, really--it’s too late

Aaron

ashley’s coming
    thanks a lot

Rhodes

guess this means no sex tonight
wait--i know--you’d rather not

Aaron

(playful)

at least it comes as no surprise

Rhodes

(facetious)

it’s a shocker

Aaron

hurry up

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

i’m not cookin’, sow you know

Aaron

that’s okay--we’ll grab some lunch

Rhodes

finally ready

Aaron

good, let’s go

Pierrot

(at Rhodes)

hubba hubba--

(to Aaron)

what a man

(to Renee)

see that package
    my o my

(to Aaron)

it’s a handsome specimen

(to Lee)

never fear
    he’s not my type

Renee

(to Pierrot)

save it buster
    settle down

Pierrot

(to Lee)

she’s just jealous

(to Renee)

    mam, i’m hitched
but i’m flattered--

Renee

    cut it clown
take a seat--

Pierrot

i’m honored--

Renee

sit

(to Aaron)

so, what happened--why’d you leave

Aaron

i just couldn’t...
    i’m not sure--

Pierrot

you can’t say that
no siree

Renee

(to Pierrot)

holy shhhhhhakespeare
    one more word...

Pierrot

(to Renee)

take a moment

Renee

(to Pierrot)

it’s okay

lee, i’m sorry--i’ll be fine

there, i’m better (what a day)

aaron, i apologize

goodness me, i’ve lost my place

Pierrot

rhodes and aaron

Renee

yes... i know

(to Aaron)

i heard a poem on your tape--
    just a second--there we go

Aaron’s Voice

(on tape)

love came softer all along
    now it plays a lazy beat
not a cymbal in the song
not the love he promised me

Renee

that’s the reason--bored to tears

Aaron

not exactly--

Pierrot

it’s a ruse
lee’s not typing, are you dear

Renee

(to herself)

i am clever, quick, and smooth

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

he was all a man could ask
    all except for one mistake

Aaron

(to Pierrot)

he made many more than that

Renee

(to herself)

i’m adored and highly paid

Aaron

(to Renee)

he called my friends and threw a bash
    to celebrate my twenty-fifth
i remember
    it was grand
they yelled “surprise” and then he kissed--

Pierrot

(to Renee)

rhodes, he cheated--

Aaron

(to Renee)

and the room

Pierrot

(to Renee)

more than once--

Aaron

(to Renee)

    you should have seen--
a garden sculpted from balloons--

Pierrot

(to Renee)

aaron read his diary

Aaron

(to Renee)

and he cooked the greatest meals--
    pastas--salads--sirloin steaks--
once he even fried an eel--

Pierrot

(to Renee)

rhodes attempted to explain

Rhodes

they meant nothing

Aaron

    you loved films
french--italian--japanese--
    always foreign--

Rhodes

zero, zilch

Aaron

british--swedish--taiwanese--

Rhodes

look... it’s just... i feel controlled

Aaron

i love trashy horror flicks--

Rhodes

sometimes, aaron... you’re so cold

Aaron

you always said “they make me sick”--
it took hours--sometimes more--
all to choose the perfect film
from the local rental store--

you always said “they make me ill”--

Rhodes

cold... in bed... you barely move
you don’t even let me touch--

Aaron

mangos were your favorite fruit

Rhodes

aaron, please
it’s been a month

Aaron

purple was your favorite hue--

Rhodes

    i swear i never meant to lie
aaron, please--

Aaron

        and babyblue--
because it matched your babyeyes--

Rhodes

    i swear i’ll never cheat again
aaron, listen--

Aaron

        and your smell--
sweet and warm--a baby’s scent--

Rhodes

ashley threatened she would tell--

Aaron

ashley

Rhodes

what

Aaron

she threatened--

Rhodes

yes...

Aaron

so, let’s have it--

Rhodes

i was drunk

Aaron

ashley--

Rhodes

no--

Aaron

but you just said--

Rhodes

she and i were at a club

Aaron

drinking

Rhodes

yes--he bought our drinks--
ashley was a friend of his--

Aaron

gay--

Rhodes

he asked to drive us home

Aaron

his apartment--
    did you stay--

Rhodes

no--we left--as soon as--

Aaron

what

Rhodes

aaron, this is hard to say--

Aaron

do you think i give a fuck

Rhodes

ashley saw us--

Aaron

fucking--

Rhodes

no
jerking off--

Aaron

each other--

Rhodes

yes

Aaron

where was ashley

Rhodes

aaron
watching us...
beside the bed

Aaron

please... you’re kidding--
    are you

Rhodes

no

Aaron

...ashley

Rhodes

aaron--

Aaron

where was i

Rhodes

touring maybe--i don’t know--

Aaron

ashley

Rhodes

aaron--

Aaron

jesus christ

Rhodes

please, i’m sorry--

Aaron

she made threats

Rhodes

only if we let her go--

Aaron

she would tell me if we--

Rhodes

yes
please, i’m sorry--

Aaron

now i know
ashley’s fired--so are you--
pack your shit and leave my house

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

purple was his favorite hue

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i’m not joking--

Rhodes

aaron--

Aaron

now
here--your records and your tapes--

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

he called your friends and threw a bash

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

and your papers
    and your crates

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

you remember
    it was grand

Rhodes

i have nowhere else to go

Aaron

call your parents--rent a room--
here--your pictures and your clothes--

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

a garden sculpted from balloons

Rhodes

aaron, listen--

Aaron

take your things

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

and he cooked the greatest meals

Aaron

here--your damn engagement ring--

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

once he even fried an eel

Rhodes

please--

Aaron

(babyvoiced)

yaw sowwy

Rhodes

aaron, stop

Aaron

spend the night at ashley’s place
    keep on jerking ’til you drop
call your stranger, just in case--

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

sweet and warm--a baby’s scent--
    always foreign--

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

let me stay

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

he swore he’d never cheat again

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

you’re a liar--
    it’s too late

Rhodes

are you certain
fine... i’ll leave

Aaron

call a mover for the rest

Rhodes

i’m so sorry

Aaron

    i believe...
bye

Rhodes

i’m going

love you

Aaron

...yes

Pierrot

aaron, that was awfully cruel

(to Renee)

don’t you think so

Renee

--

Pierrot

i agree

Aaron

(to Pierrot)

i was angry

Pierrot

you’re a fool

(to Renee)

though not as fun a fool as me

Aaron

(to Renee)

keep him quiet

Renee

(to herself)

i’m renowned

Aaron

(to Renee)

you can do it

Renee

(to herself)

bold and wise

(to Pierrot, vague)

have a seat and settle down
pull the lever
    it reclines

Pierrot

she can’t help you

Aaron

that’s enough

Pierrot

where ya goin’

Aaron

back to sleep

Pierrot

did you ever even love--

(grabs Aaron)

aaron, i won’t let you leave

Aaron

(to Renee)

make him stop--

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

you threw him out

Aaron

(to Pierrot)

he deserved it

Pierrot

aaron, why

Aaron

please--you heard--

Pierrot

he slept around
golly gee, i wonder why

you were frigid

Renee

(vague)

settle back

Pierrot

sometimes, aaron--you’re so cold

Aaron

that’s disgusting

Pierrot

it’s a fact

Renee

(vague)

have a cookie

Aaron

(to Pierrot)

let me go

Pierrot

“sorry honey--not tonight”

Aaron

you’re revolting

Renee

(vague)

they’re gourmet

Pierrot

he pled your trust a hundred times
but you preferred to watch him beg

Aaron

no--i loved him--

Pierrot

that’s a lie
call that loving

Aaron

yes... i did

Pierrot

you can’t say that
it’s not right

Lee

no... i loved him

Renee

...holy shit

Aaron

(breaks away)

are you happy--

(spills coffee)

Renee

not my desk

Pierrot

(to Aaron)

oops
    you blundered

Renee

carved by hand

Aaron

(to Renee)

make him vanish
    you’re the head

you can do it

Renee

no... i can’t

Act II

i. fourth pageant: crucifixion and resurrection

For since by man came death, by man came also the resurrection of the dead. For as in Adam all die, even so in Christ shall all be made alive.

– Corinthians

ii. madam crause foretells

Aaron’s Voice

(Pierrot plays tape)

not the love he promised me

(rewind)

a secret bible read aloud

(rewind)

i pray to mary, mother eve

(fastforward)

perhaps, forgotten, i was found--

Pierrot

(waves cookie)

aaron

(singsong)

aaron

(frustrated)

aaron--eat

Renee

(to Pierrot)

you’re too forceful
    give it up

Pierrot

(to Aaron, eats)

hmmm, delicious

Renee

(to Pierrot)

hackneyed

Pierrot

(offers coffee)

aaron, look--i filled your cup

Renee

(to Pierrot)

he’s not talking

Pierrot

(to Renee)

you don’t say

aaron

(shouts)

aaron

Aaron

christ, i heard

Renee

(to Pierrot)

let me try another way
please...

Pierrot

(mock bow)

ma-lady--fine, your turn

Renee

aaron

Aaron

what

Renee

it’s getting late

Aaron

so

Renee

we’re running out of time

(also to Pierrot)

if you’d just cooperate

(to Aaron)

aaron, sweetie
    you can try

back in college, second year
    you took a course with anna crause

Pierrot

myth and symbol

Renee

(to Lee)

did you hear

Aaron

(fondly)

i remember

Renee

(to Lee)

take that down

(to Aaron)

in an early book of yours
    (nice edition, by the way)
you make a reference to this course

(to Lee)

from the dedication page

(reads to Aaron)

for my parents--blah, blah, blah--
and for emmy, burning leaves
for my teacher, anna crause

Aaron

i’d forgotten

Anna Crause

mercy me

someone answer--what’s the time

Pierrot

(to Anna Crause)

7:30

Anna Crause

(to Aaron)

pass these out

Anna Crause

(to audience ⁷)

⁷ In addition to addressing the audience as her class, Anna Crause may also treat Renee, Pierrot, and Lee as students.

some of you i recognize
    i’m professor anna crause

let’s get started (aaron, hi)
    myth and symbol, english three--
pardon me--my throat is dry--
skim along--it’s on your sheet

papers, readings--nothing new
    always come to class on time--
(me tonight is no excuse
    just ask aaron--yup, that’s right)

english majors, raise your hands
    quite a number (seven, eight...)
i’m delighted, really glad
    (ten, eleven...) this is great

out of towners, be prepared:
    this is not an easy ride
tons of theory--don’t be scared--
    pretty soon you’ll learn to drive

where’s my lecture--mercy me--
    presto chango: reappear
ah, recovered--i’ll be brief

myth and symbol is a test
    -- so, you wonder, what’s that mean--
because it questions nothing less
    than how we render what we read

in the sixties--god i’m old--
    things were different--how we read--
yeats: the center lost its hold
    we tried to put it back again
how, you ask--by using myth
    to unify the then and now
        to execute the synthesis
            of past and present--that was how

peoples all across the globe--
different races, different tribes--
distant peoples new and old--
all these peoples myth unites
myths of being--myths of death--
myths of meaning--scapegoat rites--
myths to steer the elements--
there’s no telling how or why

sound suspicious
    sure, to you
nowadays we deconstruct
    english majors--it’s the truth
universals--screw that stuff
since the eighties--oy gevalt--
    all we do is pick apart
yeats’s center--it explodes
    leave the pieces where they are
truth’s a fascist
    meaning lies
both are agents of control
truth no longer signifies
    and myth is dealt a fatal blow

deconstruction has its ups
    english majors--you’ll agree
women--right--we’d have it tough
    if still enslaved to milton’s eve
gays, etcetera--same is true
    deconstruction sets us free
        from prejudicial absolutes:
    another myth, it sadly seems

so, why bother

    god is dead
slain by nietzsche, darwin, freud
    nowadays we just dissect
myth and symbol--what’s the point

fragmentation’s getting old
    don’t you think so--just a smidge
it’s depressing
    oy gevalt
all complacent specks and bits
must we, as postmodernists--
    scientific, skeptical--
must we then abandon myth
    here’s a question we might solve
what about the central themes--
    crime, redemption, sacrifice--
basic structures--so it seems--
    that give our texts a mythic life
social constructs--sure, perhaps
    christian dogma--partly right
        -- western lit is full of that--
still, i feel unsatisfied

you’ll be reading dickens, blake
    dostoevsky, philip roth
        mann and sexton, plath and yeats
            aeschylus and eliot--
basic structures that recur--
    crime, redemption, and the like--
buried just beneath the words--
    myths rewritten and revised
ancient symbols--ancient gods--
    reconceived for christian truth
dionysus--beelzebub--
    hades--hell--the outlaw fruit--
dickens’s stella--born of death
    freud and ancient tragedy
        blindness, vision--oedipus
            the seed of psychotherapy
it’s an endless roll of links
    reconstruction--that’s our goal
mercy me
    it’s staggering
questions--none--then on we go

(hammy)

take the wheel of signs and stars

in the sixties--(where’s my chalk...)
    presto chango: there we are

don’t make fun of how i draw

signs and stars were all the rage
    this was back in sixty nine
ancient as the human race

aaron, tell me

(hammy)

what’s your sign

Aaron

pisces

Anna Crause

(to Aaron)

    ooo, you’re on the edge
spring and winter, sea and earth
    on the brink of consciousness
death, redemption, and rebirth

(hammy)

madam crause foretold the rest

thankyou aaron

Aaron

anytime

Anna Crause

(to audience)

nowadays it’s all a jest
    one eight hundred psychic lines

things were different ages back

(of wheel)

this was meaning
    this was truth

for mystics of the ancient past
    this was sacred, absolute

fate was written in the clouds
    have a question--ask the sky

Pierrot

ask it aaron
ask it now

Anna Crause

how you’ll live--

Seth

and when you’ll die

iii. seth returns (continuous)

Seth

hello aaron

Renee

(to Seth)

how did you--

Seth

(to Renee)

how’s it going

Pierrot

(to Seth)

things are fine

Seth

(to Aaron)

are they really

(to Pierrot, suddenly)

peekaboo

Pierrot

(guards Lee)

don’t you touch her

Renee

jesus christ

Seth

(to Renee)

someone ought to cleanse your mouth

(to Lee)

it’s outrageous

Pierrot

go away

Seth

(to Renee)

awfully cheeky for a clown

Renee

things are dandy

Seth

sure, renee

Aaron

(to Seth)

how’d you find me... seth

Seth

you knew
miss me aaron

Pierrot

(to Seth, defensive)

not a shred

Seth

let him answer

Renee

he’s confused

Seth

(to Aaron)

miss me

Pierrot

--

Seth

(to Pierrot, sharp)

quiet

Renee

(urgent)

aaron--

Aaron

...yes

Seth

(to Renee)

for the record

Renee

(to Lee, remorseful)

make a note

Pierrot

(to Seth, taunting)

she’s not typing

Seth

(to Pierrot)

just you wait

(to Renee)

may we have some time alone

Renee

may you--

Pierrot

(pleads)

aaron--

Seth

(to all but Aaron)

go away

Renee

(to Seth)

you can’t do this

Pierrot

(to Seth)

it’s not right

Seth

who are you to tell me what--

Pierrot

(aggressive)

you can’t make us--

Seth

(sharp)

go outside

Pierrot

(to Seth, cowering)

right--we’re going--

(to Aaron)

best of luck

iv. autumn leaves, ii (continuous)

Seth

frightened, aaron

Aaron

what--of you

Seth

you’re resisting
    don’t pretend
aaron, it’s unfair of you
    selfish really

Aaron

thanks again

Seth

i feel sorry for renee
she could never bear the stress

Aaron

you’re acquainted

Seth

it’s a shame

Aaron

and you

Seth

and me--i try my best

Aaron

did you miss me

Seth

give it up

Aaron

can’t you answer

Seth

i don’t care

Aaron

no--you’re lying

Seth

that’s enough
really aaron--it’s unfair

Aaron

why

Seth

accept it

Aaron

what

Seth

you’ll lose

Aaron

you’re a stranger--

Seth

no one wins

Aaron

you don’t know me

Seth

yes, i do
every muscle
    every inch

stop pretending--

Aaron

    that’s a lie
you’re a liar--

Seth

it’s the truth
every smile
    every sigh

Aaron

no... you aren’t...

Seth

want some proof

i said i couldn’t write the sea
    she cupped her hands instead
as if she planned on catching me
    “but you”--she shrugged, “i can”

Aaron

that’s not published--where’d you find--

Seth

you remember--

Aaron

how’d you get--

Seth

every poem
every line

Aaron

liar--

Seth

don’t believe me yet

Aaron

no... you couldn’t...

Seth

burning leaves
you and emmy--it was dark
    trading tales and poetry
        in the college daycare park

Emily ⁸

⁸ Depending on actor-availability and directorial choice, Emily may also be played as a man (substitute “Jonathan” in place of “Emily,” “Johnny” of “Emmy,” and “John” of “Em”).

smell them aaron
not too close

Seth

back in college, second year

it was autumn

Emily

watch the smoke
boy this stuff can make you tear

feel inspired

Aaron

(to Emily)

yes--it worked

Emily

never fails to stir the muse
gosh, it’s chilly

Aaron

back to work

Emily

(playful)

i don’t wanna

Aaron

em

Emily

i’m pooped

Aaron

emmy

Emily

aaron
o alright

(consults notebook)

myth and symbol, homework one:

(reads)

choose a symbol and describe
    -- say, the ocean or the sun--
choose it, “read” it, write it out
    find a partner--

(to Aaron)

halfway done

(reads)

share your readings (what you found)
    please be sure to have some fun

(to Aaron)

anna crause is such a kook
    god, i love her

Aaron

so do i

Emily

and she’s more than fond of you

Aaron

think so--really

Emily

(imitates Anna Crause)

aaron, hi

master pisces

Aaron

(enjoys it)

knock it off

Emily

death, redemption, land and sea
did you buy it--all that talk

Aaron

(enjoys it)

it was so embarrassing

Emily

nooo--you loved it

Aaron

i confess

Emily

i was watching
you were like

(imitates Aaron)

Aaron

no i wasn’t

Emily

(laughs)

aaron--yes--

Aaron

emily, prepare to die

Emily

(laughs)

no--don’t tickle--

Aaron

koochykoo

Emily

(laughs)

watch the candle--
    aaron--help--

Aaron

(highvoiced)

help me
    help me

Emily

(laughs)

pox on you

(breaks away)

gosh, i almost peed myself

Aaron

that’s symbolic

Emily

hardyhar

Aaron

how the ancients took a piss

Emily

(stargazes)

fate was written in the stars
    close your eyes and make a wish

this is meaning
    this is truth

Aaron

is it really

Emily

i don’t know

Aaron

you’re a skeptic

Emily

so are you
still i check my horoscope

Aaron

fragmentation--nothing fits
    i’m in pieces

Emily

join the club

Aaron

bashed and broken
    centerless
all complacent scraps and crumbs

Emily

(of burning leaves)

sniff too many

Aaron

em

Emily

you’re wrong
you’re the sanest guy i know
    levelheaded, punctual

(waves a poem)

published even--lucky shmo

Aaron

you don’t get it...
    that’s okay

Emily

(apologetic)

no, it isn’t--tell me why

Aaron

things are different

Emily

’cause you’re gay

Aaron

no... not only--

Seth

(to audience, calls out)

zip your flies

aaron’s coming

Aaron

(to Emily)

back in school--

Seth

(to Aaron)

hey there faggot

Aaron

(to Emily)

since the start--

Seth

(to Aaron)

faggot--yeah--i’m asking you

Aaron

(to Seth)

me

Emily

ignore him

Seth

aaron bard

you’re a faggot

Aaron

no--i’m--not

Emily

(to Aaron)

just don’t listen

Seth

(to audience)

he’s a queer

show them aaron
    suck my cock

Aaron

i--don’t--want to--

Seth

lookie here

(grabs Aaron)

do it faggot
    show them--suck

Aaron

please don’t make me--

Seth

do it now

Emily

(to Seth)

let him go you stupid fuck

Seth

that’s a fairy
suck it down

(knees Aaron)

you’re disgusting
    go to hell

Emily

(to Seth)

fucking asshole--

Seth

(to Emily)

shut your face

(to audience)

he’s a faggot
    i could tell

Emily

aaron
    aaron
it’s okay

god--how awful--were you hurt

Aaron

seven stitches
    nothing grand

Emily

did your folks report the jerk
aaron

Aaron

what...--i never blabbed

Emily

(of leaves)

burn another
    breathe it deep

Aaron

smells like autumn

Emily

as it should

Aaron

what’s your symbol

Emily

mine--the sea
yours

Aaron

i’m thinking

Emily

(meaningfully)

make it good

Seth

(of Aaron)

you said

Aaron

(to Emily)

i couldn’t write the sea

Seth

(of Emily)

she cupped her hands instead

Aaron

(to Seth)

as if she planned on catching me

(to Emily)

but you

Seth

(of Emily)

she shrugged

Emily

(to Aaron)

i can

Seth

(to Aaron)

i could catch you

Emily

(to Aaron)

chosen yet

Seth

(to Aaron)

i could make the pieces match
    i could teach you to forget

Aaron

(to Seth)

no... you aren’t...

Seth

(to Aaron)

yes, i am

Emily

(to Aaron)

make it lovely

Aaron

(to Seth)

go away

Emily and Seth

(to Aaron)

have you chosen

Seth

(compassionate)

no one wins

Emily

(to Aaron)

make it truthful

Seth

(to Aaron)

just you wait

Emily

aaron
aaron

Aaron

(to Emily, burns leaf)

i choose this

v. an end (continuous) ⁹

⁹ This scene opens with the second dream-appearance of Joseph Bard. Again, Joseph Bard aims a gun at Aaron, and again he exits without shooting.

Aaron

jesus--jesus--
it’s okay

rhodes--you’re sleeping...--
that was dumb
rhodes--i miss you when i wake
it’s been ages... not enough

that was father--once again
you remember
    dressed to march
i can’t hear you
    i’ll pretend
could you hold me--just until--

thankyou honey

Rhodes

you’ll be fine

Aaron

could you kiss me
    just a peck

rhodes, i’m sorry--

Rhodes

it’s alright

Aaron

only toddlers wet their beds
it’s pathetic

Rhodes

i don’t care
let me go and change the sheets

Aaron

no

Rhodes

but aaron--

Aaron

rhodes--i’m scared

Rhodes

don’t be silly--

Aaron

stay with me

Rhodes

it’s a nightmare
nothing more

Aaron

no--it’s something...

Rhodes

aaron, what

Aaron

something larger...
    i’m not sure

Rhodes

it’s your father

Aaron

no... it’s not

something’s always watching me

Rhodes

now i’m jealous

Aaron

    not like that
rhodes, i think it’s after me
    i can’t stop it--

Rhodes

just relax

Aaron

first i found it in the sky
    raging like a second sun
i saw it next in mother’s eyes
i see it now in father’s gun

Anna Crause

basic structures--they recur

Aaron

rhodes--my cousin--i was nine

Emily

god--how awful--were you hurt

Anna Crause

crime, redemption, sacrifice

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

he and i were making love
    you remember--

Joseph

let it go

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

i was bleeding

Rose

o my god

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

did he hit you

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i don’t know

Pierrot

you can’t say that
please explain

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

that was when the dream began

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

did he hurt you

Seth

you’re ashamed

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i’m in pieces

Seth

broken, bashed

Renee

just be honest

Aaron

rhodes--

Emily

you’re wrong

Seth

can’t you answer

Rhodes

aaron, please--

Joseph

just stop crying

Anna Crause

skim along

Rose

quiet sweetness

Anna Crause

mercy me

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

did he hurt you

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i forget

Renee

(to Lee)

this is crucial
    take it down

Phyllis

howdy stranger

Emily

chosen yet

Phyllis

god’ll answer

Seth

do it now

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

no--it started later on

Seth

hey there faggot

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

what

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

the dream

Pierrot

you remember

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

maybe not

Anna Crause

basic structures--so it seems

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

mom, her illness made it worse

Joseph

(on cell phone)

she’s your mother--i don’t care--

Anna Crause

death, redemption, and rebirth

Aaron

(to Joseph)

i’ve been busy

Pierrot

don’t you care

Phyllis

he’s your daddy

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

then we fought

Joseph

(on cell phone)

you’re disgraceful

Aaron

(to Joseph)

dad, i tried

Pierrot

you were frigid

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i was wrong

Rhodes

    i swear i never meant to lie

Seth

you’re disgusting

Aaron

rhodes--

Rhodes

(to Aaron)

i’ll leave

Joseph

maybe now you’ll hitch a wife

Phyllis

rose, you’re crying

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

stay with me

Rhodes

(babyvoiced)

sowwy awon

Joseph

you could try

Renee

have a cookie

Pierrot

one mistake

Aaron

rhodes--it’s coming--

Emily

not too close

Aaron

(to Rhodes)

i can’t hear you

Anna Crause

what’s your fate

Pierrot

autumn leaves, they sadly blow

Aaron

something’s always looking on
    always changing
        always there

Seth

you’re resisting

Joseph

knock it off

Phyllis

maybe now he’ll say a prayer

Renee

meaning’s not your grand intent

Emily

make it truthful

Renee

did you hear

Pierrot

knocky knocky

All but Aaron

    it’s the end
go

Aaron

that something...

All but Aaron

go

Seth

it’s here

vi. final pageant: apocalypse (continuous) ¹⁰

¹⁰ The director must decide whether or not all the characters from the previous scene appear in this pageant, though it may be easier and more effective if they exit as it begins. In either case, this pageant is the first in which Aaron participates.
This pageant concludes with the third and final dream-appearance of Joseph Bard. This time, Bard shoots, and Aaron falls as autumn leaves sprinkle the stage. Joseph Bard faces the audience and reveals himself as Seth in disguise. Pierrot, Renee, and Lee gather as Seth weakly hovers over the body, Pierrot whimpering as he attempts to revive Aaron, Renee holding Pierrot like a child to comfort him. Lee gestures to Seth that Aaron be revived. Seth gravely obeys, and the stage is thick with meaning as Aaron rises and Pierrot, Renee, and Seth exit.

[T]hat old serpent, called the Devil, and Satan, which deceiveth the whole world: he was cast out into the earth, and his angels were cast out with him. And I heard a loud voice saying in heaven, “Now is come salvation, and strength, and the kingdom of our God, and the power of his Christ[.]”

– Revelations

vii. neon (continuous)

Lee

(compassionate)

here
    the record

take it
    there

Aaron

may i read it

Lee

yes
in time

are you coming

Aaron

coming... where

Lee

just beyond the neon light

look
    it’s only steps away

are you coming

don’t be scared

no more monsters
    no more shame

Aaron

(meaningfully)

do you promise

Lee

(crying)

yes
    i swear

viii. epilogue (continuous)

Susan

before the seconds learned to tick

Ashley

before the hours learned to chime

Susan and Ashley

before we lived as scientists
    counting oceans, moons, and time

Laura

i kept a garden made of spring
    trees and tulips, bears and bugs

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

before the age of numbering
i count creation all at once

Laura

i wear my flesh with brazen awe
    i name my body, unafraid

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

our bodies hold the sacred laws
and so we name them, unashamed

Laura

angels murmur through my blood
    they chant in voices thin and old

Susan

i’m the scripture

Ashley

i, the yad

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

the angels murmured and foretold

beware

Susan

your garden’s full of thieves

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware

Ashley

the neon in the sky

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware

Laura

your tulips and your trees

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

beware of monsters in disguise

Laura

the angels cast their prophesy
    and i listen

Susan and Ashley

shhh, beware

Laura

but now i’m frightened

Susan and Ashley

shamefully

Laura

knowledge ate me unawares

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

our bodies hold the sacred truths

Susan

i’m the carcass

Ashley

i, the blade

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

i stab my image in a pool

Laura

i looked and saw a monster’s face

Susan, Ashley, and Laura

moonish paper
    rocking white
green, those shadows
    greened with age
prophets call in blinking lights
    like neon buzzing on my page ¹¹

¹¹ They bow and exit. Theirs is the only bow.